


Colored Choices

by Skylar_Inkstone



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-03
Packaged: 2019-12-30 18:18:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,558
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18320687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skylar_Inkstone/pseuds/Skylar_Inkstone
Summary: Soulmate AU where once you touch your soulmate you see color for the first time ever without special lenses.Inspired by fallen_snowflake's Is Grey a Color and trixyadelano's colour | trixya





	1. Chapter 1

It pulsed in time with her heartbeat. She felt so stupid. Why the hell would she let her go out alone so late? She didn’t know where she was, but she let her feet take her, practically flying through the streets. She had to find her. She had to find her _now_. Before it was too late. Before she died.

            She skidded around a corner and saw a prone body crumpled up in the shadows. She raced towards it, whipping out her phone as soon as she saw it was her. She called 911.

            She had her eyes closed, but she must’ve heard her starting to cry, because she opened her eyes.

            “Love… you…” Blood was heavily dripping from the wound on her shoulder. “For…ever.”

            She rushed forward, ripping off her sweater, trying to get it tight enough around the wound, desperately trying to stop the flow of blood.

            “You’re not allowed to die on me, you hear?”

            She didn’t get a response, her eyes closed again.

            “Don’t you dare die,” she cried hysterically, blood seeping through the sweater. Sirens sounded in the distance. “You hear that? The ambulance is coming. Just hang on!”

            Her eyelids fluttered, but she was obviously too weak to open them. The sirens got louder, but it was too late. She suddenly found herself starting directly into her green eyes and then, with one final pulse, all colors went out.

            When the paramedics pulled up, they found her sobbing over the body, shaking violently.

            “Come back,” she whispered, crying curled up in the fetal position. “Come back to me Katya. Come back.”

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

            She was in a constant state of depression. Color Lenses didn’t do anything. Once your soulmate dies, you never see color again. The whole world stayed dulled shades of black, white and gray. She was always crying, sobbing on her bed, unable to do anything productive. Nobody could do anything about it. Eventually, she begged to be put out of her misery.

            “I can’t do this anymore Kim,” she cried, knees drawn up to her chest. “I can’t continue on this way.”

            There was nothing to be done for her. Slowly, over time, her friends were forced to conclude that she was a lost cause. She was inconsolable. She wouldn’t be the first to go crazy or die from losing a soulmate.

            And then one day, she had enough of life. She didn’t see the point in struggling day after day with no reward. There was no happiness and there was no color in her world. So she approached the balcony that Katya used to use go on to smoke. She didn’t even have to calm herself, to force herself to do it. Her will to live was gone.

            She didn’t jump, she just made sure she fell, head first. The last thing she felt was a sharp pain in her skull.


	2. Chapter 2

“You’re an idiot, you know that?”

            Trixie blinked, not seeing anything.

            “Hello?”

            “How stupid are you to actually try to commit _suicide_ Barbra?”

            “Ka… Katya?” Trixie felt her heart trying to punch out of her chest, though she couldn’t even see her legs or arms or anything.

            It was, indeed, the blonde Russian, who suddenly appeared out of nowhere. But she looked different from what Trixie remembered her.

            Her green eyes were now flecked with impossible blue shards, seemingly glowing in all the midst of nothingness. Her hair was longer than Trixie had ever seen it, the soft platinum waves reaching Katya’s upper thighs. Her skin was a beautiful tanned cream.

            She looked healthier than Trixie had even seen her. Happier even.

            “Beatrice.”

            Trixie was startled by Katya’s use of her given name, something she had never had called her and by the cold enmity radiating from Katya’s voice.

            “How could you?”

            Trixie felt her mouth gaping before finding her voice.

            “How could I? How could _you_ , you fucking _bitch_. I’m not the one who got left behind!”

            “You’re the one who’s wasting her opportunity! Do you really think that I want you to mourn me forever, let life pass you buy?”

            Trixie couldn’t look away from Katya, no matter how much she wanted to. “No.”

            “Stop being so selfish then! You stopped living your life because I died? That’s bullshit! Live for both of us Trixie.” Suddenly her body flickered into view as Katya went and grasped her hands.

            “I promise, when it’s your time, I’ll be waiting. But until then, you need to _live_.”

            Something black and malicious rouse up in Trixie. “You try living without your soulmate!” Trixie spat.

            “That’s not how things went or how they work!”

            “Well than maybe they should! I don’t _want_ to live without you!”

            Katya was clearly hurt and startled, drawing back from Trixie.

            “You think I wanted this?”

            “You think I care?”

            “Trixie, that’s not _fair_.”

            “Well it seems that life’s not fair _Yekatrina_. Apparently, death’s not so fair either,” Trixie snarled.

            “Well if me being alive and you being dead, waiting and watching every painful moment of your soulmate’s time left alive is what you want, you’re free to it!”

            “Fine!”

            “Fine!” A few seconds later, Katya’s facial expression changed to a look of horror. “Oh, shit.”

            “What,” growled Trixie.

            “Trixie? Trixie? Trixie where are you?”

            Trixie blinked in surprise. “I’m right here Katya.”

            “Trixie! I can’t see you!”

            “Katya? Katya? Katya! KATYA!” But Trixie’s soulmate didn’t answer. And then there was a sudden shift in scenery and Trixie was left very, very confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was posted on the same day as the first chapter, so please don't kill me for not having those fics added to the 'inspired by' section yet. I will try to get around to it by April 3rd, as I don't think it's okay to NOT have them mentioned by title and author.  
> Come talk to me @our-blood-is-our-ink on Tumblr.


	3. Chapter 3

            A strong sense of dread hit Katya as soon as she opened her eyes. The world was dull, colorless. Hopeless.

            Emotions hit her in the chest, causing her to gasp out in pain, a stabbing mix of guilt and horror.

            “Trixie?”

            Katya blinked, confused. She turned her head in the direction of the voice, mildly surprised to see Kim Chi, Trixie’s best friend, next to her bed side. It looked like she was in a hospital room.

            “Kim?” Katya’s eyes flew wide open. That was _not_ her voice. It sounded almost like… Like Trixie’s voice.

            “Oh my god!” Kim eyes welled up, making Katya feel rather uncomfortable. She’d never seen Kim cry. She had always went to Trixie. “You’re okay!”

            “I am?” Katya was startled again by hearing Trixie’s voice coming out of her mouth.

            Kim frowned, sniffing away the few tears that were tempting to break free. “Trixie, do you remember what happened?”

            “Trixie?” Katya asked, very confused. She felt like she should understand what was happening, but she didn’t.

            Kim sucked in a deep breath. “Don’t you remember your own name?”

            Suddenly, Katya had trouble breathing. “I’m Katya,” she choked out.

            “Wha… What? You’re not Katya, she’s… She died. You’re Trixie.”

            The room started to spin, though Katya was laying down.

            “Trixie? Trixie? Trixie. Trixie!”

            Katya felt tears gather in the corner of her eyes. “I’m not Trixie,” she whispered, a half recalled dream of watching over her soulmate from a bird’s eye view coming to the forefront of her mind.

            And suddenly, the room stopped spinning. Katya was able to see through her to tears to see a nurse bustling around her bed, adjusting something on the IV pole.

            “Trixie, what’s going on?”

            Katya couldn’t speak, her throat constricting impossibly tight. Why was Kim insisting she was Trixie? Why did she _sound_ like Trixie?

            “Trixie, please. Say _something_.”

            “I’m not Trixie. I’m Katya.”

            Kim sucked in another deep breath. “Do you remember what happened?”

            “I… Don’t think so?”

            “You don’t remember jumping off your balcony?”

            Another half memory floated up to the surface, something to do with horror and the feeling of terror. A tear rolled down her cheek.

            “Can… Can I have a mirror? Or my phone?”

            Kim silently handed her Trixie’s phone. Katya turned it on, slightly stumped by the password. She tried a few that she thought Trixie might have used, finally getting it open by typing in her own full name. _Yekatrina Petrovna Zamolodchikova_. She had to fight back more tears.

            She opened the camera app, horrified to see Trixie’s face staring back at her, her hair matted down and gauze covering a good portion of it. How the _actual_ _fuck_ was she in Trixie’s body?

            “What the fuck,” she breathed out, shocked.

            “Don’t worry, it’s not so bad. A few weeks and you’ll look good as new,” Kim assured her. Katya didn’t say a word, gawping at Trixie’s face. _Her_ face now, apparently.

            “I… Kim can I please have a few minutes? To myself?”

            Kim looked regretful. “I’m sorry, but you’re not allowed to be by yourself.”

            “What? Why?”

            Kim gave her a look. “Why do you think? You tried to commit suicide Trixie.”

            Katya blinked. “Okay. And?”

            “And you can’t be alone. We don’t want you killing yourself, Trixie. Listen, I’m not going to pretend what it’s like to lose a soulmate. I know that Katya’s death has been ha-”

             “I AM KATYA,” Katya yelled, starting to cry. “I don’t know why I’m in Trixie body. I don’t know why I’m not still dead. I don’t know _where_ Trixie’s consciousness went, but I AM NOT TRIXIE!”

            Kim looked shocked. “What?”

            “I’m _Katya_ ,” she sobbed. “And I don’t _know_ what happened to Trixie.”

            “But… You’re Trixie,” Kim protested. “You’re very clearly Beatrice Mattel.”

            Katya started to sob harder. “I’m Katya,” she whimpered. “Not Trixie. Katya.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is apparently the only fic my muse is letting me write for... You should feel very blessed. X'D  
> Come say hi on Tumblr! I'm @our-blood-is-our-ink.

**Author's Note:**

> So I need to find them, but there are these two fanfics that did this too, and they are AMAZING. Once I do, I'm going to edit this so I can add it in the 'inspired by' category. One was a Trixya and the other was a Biadore. If any of you know of either one, please let me know and make my job easier! ;P It's been a good few months, so I'm really going to have to dig deep into my history to find it when I have time.  
> Hit me up @our-blood-is-our-ink on Tumblr, I'd love to talk to y'all.


End file.
